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Ville Valo
Lenya Palso
Other band members of HIM and their wives/ girlfriends/ children


“Ville…please open the door, please!”, Ville twitched as he heard Lenya pleading on the front door. He had locked the door from the inside so she wasn’t able to get in, and sat in his living room, on the floor, his back leaned against the couch and tried to calm down. He was so angry he couldn’t even cry, so angry he hadn’t even realized what exactly has happened. The only thing he knew by now, was that his heart hurt like hell, so heavy he was barely able to breath anymore. And to hear her voice… how she begged him to let her in, made all the things he had seen coming up again. Her face while she was fucked by this stupid guy… her lips slightly parted, her golden eyes sparkling… She had enjoyed what she was doing. She had enjoyed cheating on him. His mother had been right a few days ago, the auburn haired girl was unfaithful. A few days ago… another rush of rage overwhelmed him and he jumped up, stormed towards the front door, unlocked it impatiently, dropping the key twice and ripped it open. There she was. Lenya. In all her beauty. He swallowed hard, now, in the very improper moment the tears were coming. And as the first little drop left his green eyes, she reached out for him, and opened her mouth but he cut her off, before she was even able to say a word “For how long?”. “Ville…I…let me explain first…please…”. “For how long?”. The first time he asked it had been a hiss, now he almost shouted. So loud an elderly women walking down the street turned in their direction. He grabbed Lenya by her upper arm, pulled her inside jerkily, so she stumbled into the hallway, quickly letting her go, disgust written on his face. It was disgust for Lenya, but also disgust for himself, cause as soon as he had touched her, he wanted nothing more then to make everything undone, take her small body in his arms and kiss her, wanted somebody to tell him it had all been a nightmare and everything was fine. He slammed the door shut and asked again “For how long, Lenya?”. “Ville…you”. “No! No damn it!”, his voice was loud again but suddenly broke, it was like all his strength left him, and much more tears were running down his cheeks. “Don’t you think it’s my damn right to know since when you were…doing this?”, it was nothing more but a deep whisper. “Since…shortly after we returned from the holiday in Lapland.”. The dark haired man gasped. Month. She was sleeping with another man since month. “That’s…no. This can’t be true…”, he moved back until he could hold himself up on he wall, feeling sick, and he could feel that he was terribly pale. “Leave…”. “What? No Ville I…just give me a few minutes…I can explain…”. He laughed bitterly “Do you honestly think there’s need to explain? You ‘ve fucked this idiot. You were cheating on me! You liked it, don’t you? You visited me on tour and as soon as you returned you…he…leave”. “No…you don’t understand…it’s…you’ve got no clue how hard it was for me every time you were leaving  and then Alarik was there for me and”. “Alarik? This was Alarik?”, Ville’s eyes grew wide “Your model? You had sex with one of your models?”. She nodded, looking down on the floor. “Gods…I can’t stand you anymore…”. “No… I love you…”, she made a step in his direction and stroked over his cheek. He slashed her hand away “You’re a liar. You can’t love me. I…every time I fell asleep at night, when I was touring I was thinking of you, every time I thought you might do the same but no…surprise…you’ve been busy with doing something else.”. “I don’t want it to be over…”, she whispered and broke out into tears. “No Lenya… I don’t want it to be over either…but…I can’t be with you anymore. I…it’s only weeks until I’m leaving again and it would drive me nuts to know…no…and now…do me a favor and leave…”. He could feel more tears welling up in him, all the sadness and grief, and he wanted to be alone. He wanted to cry, wanted too…he had no clue what he wanted right now. He just knew, that having Lenya this close to him was tearing his heart apart, and that it hurt so much. He barely noticed how she left, wiping tears away from her cheeks. As he heard the sound of the front door being closed, he dropped on the floor, shaking with sobs. Once more it was over. Once more everything was lost. He had known it, from the very beginning, had known that it wouldn’t work. “All the joy, happiness and wonderful feelings love brings…”, he muttered bitterly. The words Linde had spoken as he had hesitated to see Lenya again. The guitarist had been right, there had been joy, happiness and wonderful feelings, but now it was nothing, nothing compared to the pain he felt inside.

~End~